Want to try
it out for yourself? Enjoy these tips
from the Blue Curtain Club and the Jewels of the Night:
My name is Onyx and I’m a burlesque performer. Which is very different from being a
stripper. Burlesque has a long and
raucous history. We ruled the stage in
the golden twenties, thirties and forties.
Pretty much until TV. But we’re
still here and still ready to make you laugh and blush at the same time.
So you want to try your hand at burlesque? It’s fun and easy and every girl should try
it at least once. Here are a few simple
and helpful tips.
Elastic is your friend.
You know what’s not sexy?
Struggling to remove clingy clothing.
Even the most gorgeous gal (or guy) can cross the line from diva to
dorky when hopping on one foot to try and get a flimsy scrap of fabric
off. Professional dancers know the
importance of elasticized fabric (such as spandex). It can cling when you need it to and then
stretch nice and wide, leaving you room to wiggle and shimmy as it smoothly
slides off.
Easy pull snaps and zippers. Stuck fastenings can eat up a lot of floor
time. A smooth zipper can be a tease, a
little down and then a little up.
Burlesque is all about the tease and reveal. Tear-away snaps let you mount your own shock
and awe campaign on the audience. Full
length evening dress? Gone in an
instant, leaving you in corseted splendor.
Be confident. Body
shape isn’t important in burlesque, it’s all about the attitude. Find your inner sex goddess, whether it’s
channeling Kirsten Vagsness or Twiggy, Cindy Crawford or Angelina Jolie. Own the stage from the moment you set foot on
it. Know that you are sexy and
beautiful.
Find the funny. Humor
is what distinguishes burlesque from plain old fashioned stripping. Give your audience a surprise, make them
think you’re about to open a corset but instead whip out a prop like a feather
boa or a lace handkerchief. Find a
ridiculous combination, like doing a strip-tease to a Disney song. Engage with the audience to set up jokes,
like “I have two assets which help in my business, my big, beautiful … eyes.”
Enjoy yourself. This
is the other part which really distinguishes burlesque from stripping. Watch a burlesque show and you’ll see genuine
smiles on the performers’ faces. They’re
having a good time and you should, too. Figure out where you’re comfortable and stick
there. It doesn’t matter if you’re
stopping at a corset or going down to pasties.
You’re entitled to have just as much fun as the audience.
It’s all about the layers.
Anyone can yank off a top when they’re not wearing a bra and flash the
audience. It’s the performance
equivalent of a quickie. Sometimes
that’s what you want, but a real connoisseur can provide more. Most burlesque performers will end up in
pasties and a g-string but how they get there is the most interesting
part. Did they start off with balloons
and pop them one by one to the 1812 Overture?
Unwrap themselves from a sarong like the best party gift ever? Did they hide behind a feather fan to let
little bits peep out? Or did they start
in a mascot costume? The possibilities
are as endless as the combinations.
Have a good pick-up partner.
The trouble with all those layers is that eventually, someone has to
retrieve them. A pick-up person is the
unsung hero of the performance. Their
job is to pick up all the bits on stage and usually to set up props for the
next act. For a private performance,
this is less of an issue but out in public, make sure someone is grabbing your
discarded costumes. And remember to
always throw backstage. I’ve lost more
panties from bad aim than to bad dates.
Glamour gorgeousness.
You are beautiful. You got it,
flaunt it. This is the time to be larger
than life and twice as fabulous.
Fantastic eye makeup, elaborate hairstyles (provided you can move with
them) and gorgeous clothing full of sequins and sparkles. All of it for you.
Don’t worry about the dancing. A sense of rhythm is helpful but not
crucial. Some of the best performances
have been done to slow songs without any sense of beat. Use the mood of the music to enhance your
actions.
It’s always more fun with friends. Women can be the most catty, vicious
creatures on earth but we also support our fellow sisters like nobody’s
business when we have to. A few like-minded
friends allow for plenty of theatrical possibilities and take the pressure off
you as a single performer.
In the end, a burlesque performance should reflect who you
are. No one can be really comfortable
pretending to be something they’re not, even for a few minutes. If you’re an exhibitionist, go all out. If you’re shy, tease them into a frenzy. Like to cook?
Come out in a Suzy Homemaker costume.
Into horses? Whips, leather and
riding habits. This is an invitation
between you and the audience.
See you on stage.
-
Onyx
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